The Rise in Gun Culture
I don’t as a rule suffer from writers block. This may seem like an odd statement considering the pathetic frequency with which these articles appear, however I stand by it. What I am afflicted by is subject block (if there is such a thing). I simply can’t think of things to write about. With a view to getting round this problem I asked my friend Maddy to suggest a topic for me to muse over. Knowing the style and general irreverence of Brainjam along with my own preference for light-hearted tosh, she kindly provided me with ‘The Rise in Gun Culture’.
Frankly I don’t see why this is considered a problem. Simply sterilize your gun with disinfectant or a mild fungicide and you should be OK. It seems an odd thing to worry about really. I think she probably had guns on her mind after having a 'piece' pulled on her recently whilst she was escorting a small child on horseback. (The child was on the horse, not Maddy which makes for a less amusing image.)
I believe that some folk have raised concerns about the increase in numbers of guns in society. Personally I’m rather chilled with the idea although I do find the proliferation of bullets and cartridges a distinct worry. Ban all projectiles of this ilk and the world will be a safer place say I. Wars, for one, would become a lot more fun. Imagine Rageh Omar reporting from Baghdad on yet another friendly fire incident - British troops suffering injuries as the Americans pelt them with half-bricks from behind a hedge.
Even better would be a return to swordplay. Chivalry would reign once again as captains from each side call one another out and attempt to draw blood. In fact the re-introduction of such a highly skilled form of battle might see the USA retire from warfare all together!
Food for thought I’m sure you’ll agree, yet if there are lessons to be learned, they are these: Don’t work with horses and small children in Huddersfield and, if you know anyone who does, don’t ask them to suggest the subject for an article from which you wish to derive some humour.
